Release Date: 7/29/2010
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Hero of Sparta was a mobile sleeper hit from Gameloft that featured a God of War esque style of play, but actually worked and was pretty fun. It had gruesome deaths, big bosses, and injected with Greek mythology. The sequel was highly anticipated, but all we get is a big steaming pile of almost non-working crap. How can you screw this up so bad? By doing stuff the engine wasn’t designed for. Instead of building a new engine they piecemealed stuff into the engine, but it can’t handle it and it broke the whole thing.
Let’s start off with the horrendous combat. This is the number one thing an action adventure needs to get right and this is the most broken thing. Instead of individual attack buttons, you’re presented with an attack “slider” that goes four ways. Thanks to highly unresponsive controls and the slider is so small, that you don’t know what combos you’re doing since you’re just flicking away trying not to die. Another bad move: Why put the execution icon right next to the slider? Everyone time it pops up you’ll hit it while frantically flicking away, and the execution moves are slow, stale, and too long.
OK, so what about magic? Nope, it’s broken too. Instead of a magic button, we get to hold down that attack slider. Poor move because of, once again, the unresponsive controls you’ll hold it and nothing happens. You have to lift your thumb and press for a few seconds before anything happens and with the high difficulty, this can cost you your life. Not only is the magic button screwed up, but there’s no separate magic from the weapons. Each magic type is associated with a weapon so if you want lightning you have to switch to the staff if you want a whirlwind you have to switch to the wings.
Can platforming at least be good? NOPE! Instead, you get unresponsive controls that lead to constant deaths and the camera is horrible. Why can’t I see ahead of where I’m going? Why do I die when I touch the edge of something?! Really?! Forget the platforming, and you can just forget everything else. I have never played such a horrible game on an iTouch device and even the graphics are hideous. Look at what Infinity Blade can do then you get Hero of Sparta II looking like an old PS1 game. The story is even stupid and hardly exists, the game drags on too long, and I couldn’t even finish the game it was so broken. When lava is chasing me up a ramp it’s ok to lock parts off to kill bad guys (Remember the end of God of War II?) but don’t make execution moves slow me down, and having so many guys to kill wouldn’t be so bad if the fighting actually worked. The lava will almost be at my feet then I’ll get stuck in an execution move and then I’m dead. Why?
Overall, I only wasted 99 cents on this crap, but I wouldn’t even play it if it were free. There’s a ton of slowdown and lag even on an iTouch 4 device which makes the unresponsiveness more unresponsive. Stay away from this and stick with the first game. There are better action adventure games on the iTunes store, and Gameloft should be ashamed for the garbage that HoS2 is.